I'm alive and well and was planning on keeping up the hiatus until tomorrow afternoon and then I saw this article on cnn.com. Grrrr.
The headline states: Travolta 'struggling' five months after son's death
Then, in the top section, where they clue you in as to what you can find in the article it reports:
- Denzel Washington: John Travolta still grieving his son's death five months ago
- Actor unable to help promote "The Taking of Pelham 123," Washington says
- Jett Travolta, 16, died in January while on vacation with parents in the Bahamas
- "One moment he's OK and the next he's in tears," Washington says of Travolta
Really? Who would have guessed it? Who would have thunk that a person would still be mourning their baby? I don't get angry often, but this strikes me as beyond insensitive. It's only been FIVE months, people.
Mr. Washington was actually quite sweet in what he had to say, and really, the article itself isn't as snippy as I had feared it would be. And, I know I'm coming at this from an entirely different point of view from many many people and that most people wouldn't see anything out of the ordinary in those bulletted points. However, I don't think it's to be unexpected that Mr. Travolta and his wife are still grieving. Of course they are! They will for the rest of their lives because they are forever changed. They have lost a most precious and beautiful child and my heart still hurts for them.
Again, I'm eternally thankful I'm NOT famous and I've been "allowed" to grieve my way, not some way that is prescribed as "normal", that my pain and sorrow aren't news fodder. I will say an extra prayer for Mr. Travolta and Ms. Preston this evening.
And, no, this is not one of my more eloquently written pieces, but I felt I had to write. Until you've walked a mile in their shoes, don't make statements about people still grieving. Grrrr.
16 comments:
I still grieve the loss of a baby that I did get to hold, but never got to know. That's been 6 years. Having a child in your life, getting to know their great little personalities and sharing all those life moments with them-- how could anyone put a time limit on that? No fair. Back off and let them handle this in the way that they need to.
I saw that article and cringed as well. Duh. Of COURSE he's in tears. Of COURSE he's not functioning well. I'd be a little bit concerned if he was just fine going about his life like normal. My heart just aches for them, and for all of you that have lost precious children. Prayers for them from here as well.
Agreed. My son is autistic and many have made comments about the Travolta's keeping their son's condition on the down low.
I feel it is their business. And now way, now how would I want to be famous.
How does one EVER get over losing a child?
That was an insensitive article. I've never experienced a loss, but even I am completely annoyed by their use of the word "still." Five months is nothing compared to the lifetime that the Travoltas will experience "still" mourning their son.
I am glad you spoke out. Now, if people would just try to be sympatheic. This world is insensitive and needs more JESUS!
Love you, Rach.
Jane
I buried a husband, not a child. But Rachel, you said it with much more eloquence than I ever could. Thanks for bringing this up. I hope all is well, Anja.
We live in a very cold, unfeeling, driven world. People expect you to bury your loved one and maybe mourn for a week...then you are just supposed to get back to business as usual. No wonder our society is such a mess!
You've said this and written it just perfectly.
Steph
True.
I know its a different story. But I DO feel sorry for famous people who arent left alone.
I know that Anna Nicole Smith was a mess to start with, and technically she died of an overdose. But I also belive that she actually died of a broken heart.
That said. Scientology freaks me out. I cant believe so many people follow a science fiction writer and take his advise. I know that isnt what killed Jett. There is no cure for autism as of yet. So this probably would have happened anyway. But that religion just scares me.
Thanks Rach - you have opened all our eyes by sharing your heart day in and day out!
Hugs.
I'm just catching up on the blogs and glad to see that you are taking a little break - you need it!
I like what you wrote here as well. I had not heard about that article but had seen his movie preview and wondered if he would do the media cicuit for it.
I always appreciate your writing on the topic, Rach. Thanks for sharing!
I agree, the title of that article is just wrong. I also feel in many ways that society wants/expects people to push their feelings down so far and not display them. I read somewhere that increasingly the definition of "maturity" in today's society includes a lack of displaying emotions. For someone who can be very emotional, and who has trouble not displaying my emotions this is a bit disheartening. It almost seems to say that it is not an adult thing to FEEL! I'm sorry but wtf?
You're right on. Celebrities or not, there are some topics that the media just needs to butt out of.
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