Thursday, May 31, 2012
But, life does, in fact, go on. And, what a blessing it does. The numbness gives way to soul shattering pain that gradually fades to a dull ache that then subsides to a gentle throb of longing and remembrance. I had no idea it could ever get to this point. I get caught up in the dailiness of living (and cleaning up the dog's food--all five pounds of it--for the third time that day) and I'm grateful for it. I'm so happy to be here and be with my girls and enjoy them (even when I'm ready to throw them in the compost bin for dumping out the dog's food and squeezing conditioner on the carpet...).
Sometimes the joy comes in the little things--Lil's excitement and happiness over her swim lessons, Ellie telling me, "I wuv you too, Mommy" when I tuck her in. Other times it's in the things we do together--painting pottery (Beanie sat still for 45 minutes concentrating on that little cat of hers), a trip to BG, a walk down DoG Street and the FM.
Last Sunday it was a trip to the VLM. Lily hadn't been with us in a while although B and I had been with Beanie a couple of times this year. It's so wonderful to be able to watch the girls at the museum, seeing how they have grown and changed over the years. Lil has been going to the VLM since she was younger than Ellie. She knows what she wants to see and now that she is older, is finding new things to explore. She's so inquisitive, and is using her newly developed reading skills (she's amazing, I tell you!) to read the signs to glean even more information about the critters she sees.
He's in the upper right--look for the eyes.
This evening at swim practice, she used the kickboards halfway across the pool. She's going to be swimming before we know it!
1. Alex stopped by to visit this evening. I'm not sure how it has happened, but I seem to be the "trusted adult" many of the teen girls come to to talk to. I don't mind. In fact, I rather enjoy it. Of course, I'm sure MY girls won't be coming to me, lol!
2. Ellie. Just Ellie. She's so silly and delightful. I love watching the way children make connections to their world. If she finds a sippy of milk that has been out over night, she'll drink and tell me "It's dirty!" She doesn't like dirty milk and I don't blame her. So, when I get a new sippy together I tell her it's "clean milk". Ha!
3. Bitty. What a girl. She's such a nifty kid and I'm utterly in love with her at this age and stage. :o)
4. Walking with Michelle. She's making progress and I'm SO proud of her! And, it was MUCH cooler today so that was lovely as well. (Only 80 when we were walking this morning, lol!)
5. I made the most amazing orange fluff this evening. Yum!
Alex brought by T's parents' address and I'll be making them a card and getting it mailed tomorrow. His funeral will be tomorrow. My prayers will be with them.